With Clinton Portis recently retiring, I remembered all the funny personalities he would take on, making it fun to be a Redskins player and fan even though the team was struggling and couldn’t seem to get on the winning side of anything.
This brought me to trying to figure out who (or what) the D.C. Sports fan can call the next “Kid Bro Sweets” or “Bud Fox” (personally my favorite C.P. personality).
I began to think of the different personalities around D.C. sports and I came up with these gentlemen:
The Washington Nationals Presidents Race
If you haven’t witnessed the Presidents Race you are really missing a treat. The most famous presidents from our beautiful nation come to Nationals Park to race! The presidents are George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Jefferson, and Teddy Roosevelt…. (And sometimes Jayson Werth with an overall record of 2 wins). These races bring uniqueness to the Nationals organization and to the town. If you’re not a baseball fan, you should still check out at least one race…trust me it will be embedded in your brain as one of the funniest things you have ever seen at a ballpark.
Well…..I had to. JaVale had… well..some positive plays as a Washington Wizard, but most of them being the world’s worst defensive plays known to man. It’s pretty embarrassing when you can’t post up on a 5’9” Isaiah Thomas and your 7’0”. Everytime you turn on ESPN’s NOT top 10 you can almost be a 100% that the Wizards are going to be on that list and 110% that its going to have something to do with JaVale McGee. People all over latched on to him just to see him screw up in some sort of way.
The Washington Nationals “Bearded Wonder” has shown that growing a very large man beard is just the manly thing to do. Werth is probably one of the biggest kids on the team, always with a big smile on his face enjoying playing the sport that he loves. If we could quickly let’s take a look at this wonderful beard, it kind of looks “Mountain Manish” but at the same time very neat. Jayson Werths fame with the Nats fans has grown tremendously not only with his at bats and the fact that he’s a gold glove player….it’s gotta be the beard!
The spotlight is Harper’s for the taking, from his outlandish eye black to his old school baseball look with the stirrups from time to time, Harper has become one of the biggest stars not only in DC, but in the world. Harper has been big time for a while now, making the cover of sports illustrated at the age of 16, and being called up to play in the bigs at age 19. And with a quote so popular that it had to be broadcasted all over the entire sports world…”THAT’S A CLOWN QUESTION BRO!”, Harper should be a top DC sports personality for many years to come. From message boards to t-shirts to just waiting for your friends to say something stupid so you can use it, this kid can be the top media giant in the DMV.
Probably the funniest Russian you will ever meet, Ovi has given us something to talk about here in D.C. over the past 7 years with his awesome goals and reckless way of playing hockey. But Ovechkin is also very quick to joke around when he has the chance, from being caught on T.V. checking out some girls in the stands at the All-star game, impersonating Don Cherry as an old school robo,t to calling Sidney Crosby a crybaby and a giving him a “monkey Boy” gesture during a game, Alex has quickly made a little home in all of our favorite D.C. personalities.
“Captain Chaos” as he is known around the DMV has taken us for a ride for the last 8 years. With his outlandish training camp short shorts to him pumping gas in complete Redskin uniform, Chris let us into his world and we loved every minute of it. There are only a handful of players that get there name echoed through a stadium every Sunday, and Chris is and was one of them. My best Chris Cooley moment was when he tried to cash his signing bonus in at a bank drive threw. Cooley is near and dear to all of us in the DMV, so from all of us to you Chris, we thank you for the wonderful memories.
The man of a thousand faces, Portis has given us some of the most memorable characters and big laughs, with all of his personalities from Sherriff Gonna Getcha, Coach Janky Spanky, Kid Bro Sweets, Bud Fox, Minister Yah Mon, Dolemite Jenkins, DR. Do Itch Big, Electra and Choo Choo. Portis made us forget about the teams struggles for just 2 to 3 minutes at Redskins Park. He was the workhorse for the skins and always seemed to have time to have fun with the fans and players.
These cast of characters stand out to me the most here in D.C.
If you guys have anymore please feel free to add on!